Predicting This Year's Most Annoying "Topical" Halloween Costumes

by Chiara Atik · October 12, 2010

    Halloween 2008 was indisputably the year of The Sarah Palin costume. 2009? The Snooki. What faddish, "au courant" costumes will we see everywhere this year? We have a few guesses...--

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    The Angry Jet Blue Flight Attendant

    You KNOW this one is gonna be popular if Ricky's is selling a version. The store-bought costume comes with a bandaid (?), tie, and somewhat inflammatory gay pride badge on the uniform. Is that because the angry flight attendant was...gay? Way to miss the point, Ricky's! (Also, way to piss off airline employees everywhere by saying "steward" instead of "flight attendant" like they've been trying to get people to do since 1982. No wonder these guy's snap!"

    You can make your own version of this costume by sticking on some airline wings, splurging for an emergency oxygen mask on Ebay, and carrying around mini-bottles of Bailey's.

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    The Lady Gaga Meat Costume

    Maybe it's because she knew that generic "Lady Gaga" costumes are the lazyman's perfect Halloween costume (Leotard, fishnets, wig, done) that Lady Gaga completely upped the ante with this (real? Not real?) costume made entirely of meat.

    Surely some Halloween stores are selling versions of this, but you're gonna look dumb walking around with FAKE haunches of venison draped all over your body. If you insist on doing this costume, do it the right way, please.

    Go down to the local butcher, ask for some deliciously fatty cuts, and drape to your hearts content, making sure to leave the back uncovered so your nude thong is on display.

    Important! Don't forget a diamond choker and a steak worn at a jaunty angle on your head!

    Katy Perry California Gurls Costume

    First of all, I officially have no respect for anyone who chooses this as a costume, though I can understand the juvenile appeal of a costume that allows you to playfully flirt-spray guys with whipped cream all night.

    Get a Betty Page Wig, a bikini, and about six bottles of Reddi-Whip, so you can refill them all, night, long.

    Various Characters From "The Social Network"

    Whatever the "it" movie is in October of any given year, there will definitely be thousands of "homage", oh-so-clever costumes, and we have a feeling that this year's The Social Network will be no exception.

    Tall guys will no doubt get a kick from dressing as The Winklevoss Brothers, and we at GofG are fully preparing ourselves to spend all of October 31st running into people dressed as our boss. If we were 6'2 and 220 pounds, we might consider this costume ourselves: just grab a buddy, wear either some sort of athletic apparel, a suit and tie, and some Olympic medals. (If you want to be extra clever about it, make a mask of your face and have your buddy wear it all evening, a reference to how The Social Network was shot using two bodies but one actor...)

    If you're more of a Mark than a Winklevoss (and if you're honest with yourself, you'll know which one you are...), you have an even easier costume! Just don an oversized Harvard sweatshirt, shorts, Adidas Adussage Foam Sandals (with socks!) and pretend like you have Aspergers all night. Done!

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    The Lindsay Lohan Jailbait, Second Edition

    Oh man, this one is so easy it kills us. Just buy an orange jumpsuit, and ridiculously, extravagantly, and, dare we say, retardedly tall heels. (If you don't want to wear your Louboutin's out on Halloween, just spray tacky ones red on the bottom.) Presto, Lindsay! We're pretty sure this one is going to be everywhere.

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    Taylor Momsen or Ke$ha (Because let's face it, they're interchangable)

    Take the most revealing, shortest black dress you can find. Now rip it up, so that there's even LESS fabric. Put mascara on your hair to give yourself the darkest roots possible, and tease the rest of your hair. Put on as much dark eyeshadow as you can possibly muster. Put on some fishnets and tall heels. Now pout. Pout harder. You're done.