Chelsea Handler
Name: Chelsea Handler
Credentials: Talk Show Host, Comedian, Actress, Producer, Published Author
Honorable Comedic Mentions: Chelsea Lately, Stand-up Comedy,
My Horizontal Life: A Collection of One Night Stands, Chelsea Chelsea, Bang Bang
“I rolled over and picked up Us Weekly magazine off the floor. The cover had a picture of Angelina, Brad, and their little Eskimo son, Maddox. I saw staring at the photo, wondering why this little boy looks so pissed off in every picture.
At first I thought he was just pissed about his Mohawk, but then I realized he’s probably furious. Maddox must have thought he hit the jackpot when some A-list celebrity rescued him from third-world Cambodia, only to discover that she was going to shuffle him back and for the to EVERY other third-world country in the universe. He’s probably like, 'When the fuck are we gonna get to Malibu, bitch?” ― Chelsea Handler, Are You There Vodka? It's Me, Chelsea
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