Mardi Gras
Look, it's the party of the year tonight, and although its epicenter is about 2000 miles away from here, that doesn't mean you can't down 15 Hurricanes, show everyone your tits (we mean that in a non-gender-specific way, so go to town, Spencer Pratt!), and get all that debaucherous impulse out of your system before Lent, even if you're not part of a religion that observes Lent.
In other words, most of what you'll want to be doing tonight can be found
right here on our handy guide to Fat Tuesday in L.A.