"Best $2k I Ever Spent!" Celebrating The "American Reunion" Premiere With Our Favorite Quotes From The Original "Pie"

"I have to admit, you know, I did the fair bit of... masturbating when I was a little younger. I used to call it stroking the salami, yeah, you know, pounding the old pud. Of course, I never did it with baked goods, but you know your uncle Mort, he pets the one-eyed snake 5 or 6 times a day."

Eugene Levy There's not a movie in the world that Eugene Levy can't make funnier with his presence.